Felix Got to Me

**Note: My original title was rather bitchy and I decided to change it.

I don't care enough to be pissed off or try to piss you off. ^That's my lazy comeback. I've got more things on my mind than Tyler. I hate what he's doing to himself, and I care, yeah, but I dunno. I thought she'd be okay but she's the karma my necklace said would come back around. It's sad. He's doing more damage on himself than he's ever done to any girl, because of a girl that finally got him hooked.
Dunno if that's what he deserves or what.


On to my life. I'm so done with other people's drama. My anxiety is bad enough. I'm loving this new excuse. Thank you, therapist. <3 Anywho, I don't wanna pile on someone's non existent/over exaggerated problems to my own.

Speaking of, Matt, I don't think I actually like you. I'm having one of my moods. Hopefully from PMS. PLEASE BE FROM FUCKING PMS BECAUSE IF I HA... You're just there for me. In a really good friend way. You make me smile and  I always have a manic when I'm talking to you. If you haven't noticed I become slightly addicted to the few things that make me happy and like to hold on to them. I just said I'm addicted to you. I take that back cause I don't feel like rephrasing. I'm limiting my pot intake. I think. I've been sober since Saturday. That's something for me. :) Yet I haven't had very many happy moments in all that time. I might quit if they put me on anti depressants. Then again I'm still going to have to find my happiness from an outside source. I wonder if someone can think their self out of depression. If anyone could, it'd be me... the old me, at least. I'll see what I can do. :T I thought about that really hard yesterday and stumbled across a shitload of realizations when I couldn't get my fix. Dude...I sound like a crackhead. Get my fix. Wow. xD But for real. For me this time. Usually I know in the back of my mind I won't quit smoking. I dunno how many times I've told people I would. It's just that sadness that creeps up on me. I hate it. I like laughing and being obnoxious yelling whenever I get a craving and want to go to Sonic and see David. :T

I miss Jessica. If I think about it, I had a natural high when I was around her and my family :3 Teeheehee. Sadness would get me, but I dunno. I'm really anxious about this weekend. If I get to go I hope they don't treat me different. I feel like crying everytime I think about how much I've let Felix down. :\ Dude, I am crying. My period needs to hurry up.

I even feel bad about the title, but it's whatever. You'll bitch and I won't care. I'm sorry already.