Baby, Don't Worry

Girls these days are desperate creatures. They can't go a week without being with someone new. Ha. Pathetic. No offense to you. It sucks being alone and it's torture being lonely, but it's ridiculous how weak some of these females are. I love myself. I love being independent. So what if I don't have someone to cuddle with every night? So what if I'm not having sex with someone everyday? (Sluts with boyfriends kill me. The type of girl that thinks she's better than others because she only has sex in relationships, but has sex with all of her boyfriends within a week of dating each.) I don't mind not being someone who's madly in love with anyone that doesn't kill their self after listening to me bitch about my miserable life all the time. I don't mind not lying to myself, saying I'm happy and that I've never been so happy in my life, then with someone I barely know. You don't know him. You never will. You know as much about him as you do about yourself. How can you know anything about yourself when you pretend you're something you're not and feel things that you're not feeling? Be real with yourself. You're only happy because you're not alone with yourself. He makes you happy because he keeps you away from yourself and when he's not around you hate him because he's leaving you with the piece of shit you hate so much. Yourself. It's not just girls. It's guys too. This is why I don't like people. This is why I don't like relationships. It's all fake. You need to be alone and come to reality with who you are and become comfortable with that person. Embrace that person. Love that person. Cause, damn, you can't actually love someone until you love you. It's so sad. I don't know how no one sees this themselves.

I'm real with myself. I know that he doesn't make me happy and that he's not the one and that I'm just lonely and horny and he's the most attainable thing there is. Ehh, and that's decent. If he was happy with himself, he'd be better and worth so much more. That's why I try so much with him. I feel bad for him as a person because he has so much potential and it hurts seeing so much gray in a world where colors should blossom. Plus I really just.. hormones. Killing me.